A Letter to May: Calm Down, You’re Not December

From February to May, our house turns into a full-blown training facility. With two kids in competitive sports, we’re clocking in four to five practice days a week. Every. Single. Week. It’s like living in a sports-themed time loop—only with more laundry and fewer trophies.

I used to think May meant winding down—easing into summer with a cold drink and fewer Google Calendar alerts. That sweet, naive version of me? She’s gone. Now May means hitting 5th gear, juggling schedules like a caffeinated circus clown, and crying quietly behind my oversized sunglasses until June 10.

Spoiler: We Absolutely Signed Up for Summer Sports

You know those summer leagues I swore we’d never join? Yeah. About that.

Past Me: “We’re taking the summer off. The kids need time to be bored, play in the sprinklers, be kids.”
Present Me: “Here’s your jersey. Game’s at 6. Don’t forget your skates, your water, and your will to live.”

One sports season ends just as the next one starts. Who needs a break when you can have snack duty on a Tuesday and a 5:30 p.m. Friday game?

Celebrations, Cookouts & Controlled Chaos

May isn’t just busy. It’s festive busy. We’ve got:

Five family birthdays
Mother’s Day (which I somehow end up planning?)
Memorial Day cookouts
A grocery list longer than a CVS receipt
And the house must be cleaned… you know, so guests don’t know we live like raccoons with Amazon Prime accounts.

School’s Out (But Not Quietly)

And then, of course, there’s school. Which doesn’t end so much as it explodes.

Final projects. Standardized testing. Daily homework. And the Herculean effort of making sure your child arrives well-rested and full of “brain fuel.” (Yes, Goldfish and three strawberries absolutely count. They were flung with love.)

And oh—the emails. SignUp Genius strikes again:

End-of-year parties
Promotion ceremonies
Teacher appreciation (seriously, don’t forget the gifts this year—no one wants to repeat the panicked drive-thru gift card run of ‘24)

Meanwhile, your kitchen becomes a school supply graveyard as the classrooms get cleaned out. Somehow you must sneak artwork into the trash without launching a full-blown emotional spiral. (“You’re throwing away my frog collage? He has feelings, Mom!”)

Spring Cleaning, Summer Planning & Oh Right—You Work

While you’re purging joyless junk for the neighborhood yard sale (that you forgot you were organizing), you’re also supposed to have lined up summer camps and activities. Camps that somehow book faster than concert tickets and cost more than your first car. Man I miss that bright yellow jeep…

And did I mention—you have an actual job? The kind with deadlines, meetings, and onboarding three new hires (because I like to spice things up). Let’s get them ramped in 60 days instead of 90. Why not?

The Bright Spots in the Madness

But in the middle of the chaos, there are moments. Glorious, sun-soaked moments:

Virtual meetings from the porch with coffee while birds battle me for my blueberries
Midday walks where I pretend I’m not dodging Teams messages
The smell of burgers on the grill and Solo Stove season officially reopened
Farmers markets where I can finally be reunited with my beloved goat cheese
Lazy Saturdays—when there’s miraculously no lacrosse—spent defending cucumbers from bugs and tomatoes from bunnies

It’s still chaos. The to-do list is never-ending. The kids are stressed, the dog’s shedding, and that work trip during all the 5th grade end-of-year activities? Triggered massive mom guilt… but also got me out of decorating duty, so, silver lining?

The Final Countdown

We’re almost there. Three more Fridays. Just three. You can practically smell the sunscreen and hear the summer playlist.

Until then? Take your vitamins, check your email (again), and pack the cooler—because May might be mayhem, but we’re making it. One meltdown at a time.